Tuesday, May 12 at 00:03

Kill Bill v. The Antjes

Breaking News: the Police Office of the city of Ilmenau just informed us that a disaster of large proportions is about to occur and disturb the quiet and cosy town of Ilmenau.

Bill, the well-known killer who has yet remained uncaptured by the German Police, despite being searched for almost 4 months, came to Ilmenau. His first victim is one of the celebrities of the town: the orange Antje mysteriously disappeared from her home at the train station. She was last seen staying there, probably waiting for the ISWI participants. Locals claim that it was the storm that took it away, but an official source claims it was in fact kidnapped and abused by Bill during the night of May 9th. Quasimodo, her brother, is still in the city centre but has been put under maximum surveillance by the Ilmenau Rathaus.

The other two brothers of the famous family are still being kept away from people's eyes to guard them from Bill's bad intentions. An upstanding citzen, Beatrix Kiddow (aka The Bride) informed the Rathaus via fax that she herself is going to guard Anne and Happy Hitler, the other two new Antjes. A special team of doctors was send to fix Anne's nose (septical deviation, according to the last medical results) before being shown to the public. Happy Hitler, her younger brother still suffers from hitlerofobia (by rising both her right and middle hand and imitating a well-known gesture).

Special agent Knuwu, in charge with this case, just informed us that they will keep things under control. It's just that now he's out to lunch with this chick, he'll be back later.


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